U Don't Have 2 Be Beautiful 2 Turn Me On

I continue to be baffled by the phenomenon that is Prince. Apparently, many women find him attractive. I think he looks like a woman who has taken enough testosterone to grow a whispy mustache and some chest hair. During the Superbowl halftime show tonight a female friend of mine told me, "It's all about sex. Every time I hear a Prince song I want to have sex." Intrigued by this explanation, I decided to text message my girlfriend to get her reaction.

My text: "Does Prince make you feel sexy?"

Her instantaneous response: "Nothing about him makes me want to have sex. Ever."

God, I love this girl.